I'm amazed that I'm here again, especially since it's almost midnight and I have to work at 7 tomorrow morning.
I've been thinking a lot about the question, "what's your passion?" I never really know how to answer that. What exactly is a passion - is it something you're good at, something you enjoy doing, something you would do all day every day if you had the chance?
I'd say I'm good at my job - mostly because I'm organized and detail-oriented meaning I think ahead about every possible angle and plan accordingly. This drives my husband nuts! But I wouldn't say I'm passionate about my job - is it something I would do if I didn't get paid to do it, probably not.
So what do I enjoy? I enjoy lazy weekends, winding down after a long week and just relaxing. No decisions to be made, no plans to make. I enjoy reading magazines, watching Friends, listening to music, and so on. But am I passionate about any of these things? It doesn't seem like it, they don't have enough value to receive such a strong emotion as passion.
Then there is the age-old question of, "what would you do if you could do anything in the world?" To be honest, I don't know, but I have some ideas. I think I would love to teach, not high school - only college or another form of adult education. I would love to teach about anatomy, it's my favorite subject. Especially when you put it together with nutrition and discussing all the ways the food we eat negatively effects our bodies, it's astonishing! I also love to talk about leadership and would love to work with students to teach them how to be effective leaders in the world. And not in a "how to win your way to the top" method but in a "grow up and take responsibility for your own mess" method.
What else? I have always been intrigued by dogs. Not in a weird way, I know they're not humans, but they really are amazing! They can do so many things, from hunting to finding a person buried 10 feet under the snow to detecting seizures. I have thought many times about doing something in line with animal work - being a vet, starting a pet sitting business, training dogs, etc.
And of course there is the desire in me to stay at home with my kids and spend my "spare time" making crafts and other handmade goodies. It would be so great if we were able to be mildly self-sufficient, making our own breads, cheeses, growing vegetables, etc. That's right, I'm actually a farm girl at heart.
After all that I'm still left with the question of what am I passionate about? I went ahead and looked up the word - it means a strong or compelling emotion towards something.
That doesn't help...
So let me pose a new question, why do we spend so much time searching for what we're passionate about? For me, I want to enjoy every day of my life and not just shuffle my way through mundane activities. It makes sense to me that if I discover my passion and spend my days doing that thing, I will better enjoy life. Maybe I need to stop searching for this passion I think is out there and just make the choice to enjoy life!
Ouch...
It does make sense that a lot of the reason I see my daily task list as ordinary and boring is because I am continuously thinking about what I would rather be doing. Man, I hate being challenged. I mean I love that God continues to work in me each day, but it's so disappointing to realize these struggles could so easily be taken care of if I just made the choice to deal with them.
So there it is - my new challenge is to be passionate about LIFE! To embrace each activity that comes my way as exactly what the Lord has for me this day and enjoy it. So much easier said than done, I know. I can give it my best though.
Good night!
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Blogging...
I'm wondering if it's time to post something on our page, it's been a while. I've never really gotten into blogging, I don't quite understand it - what do you talk about, who really reads it anyway?! I've read some good blogs lately and it's inspired me to try.
I used to journal a lot, daily, sometimes multiple entries a day. I haven't done that as much lately - when I say lately, I mean the past two years. It may be because I don't have as much time any more, but I see mothers of five children blogging/journaling - time shouldn't be an issue. Maybe I've just gotten bored with my thoughts. I certainly have thoughts, I talk to myself all day long, maybe it's just boring to write them down because they're typically the same thoughts I had last week. Wow! That makes my life sound awful - life really isn't boring, it's great, just with boring thoughts.
Another reason I realized it may be a good idea to blog is, well for one I like typing more than handwriting (isn't that sad, what a technical world we live in?), but also because more and more lately I am not sure of what to say to people that ask "how are the Hankins doing?" My response is always "good," because we are good, life is good. But I feel I owe the people in my life more of an explanation than "good." I just can't ever think of what to say in the moment, we work, we play, we hang out with people, we eat and sleep, then do it all over. Once again - life is not boring, just repetitive!
Maybe I'll start by sharing our story so people can know a bit more about where we are coming from. My husband Jeff and I have been married for 4.5 years. We're still in a place where we have to include the .5 in our years so we feel more experienced! But really, we're still newlyweds - we've learned a lot but have so much more to learn. He grew up in Texas, outside of Houston, I grew up in Nebraska, we met and married in Michigan, and have since lived in Kansas, Ohio, and now Texas. The story is longer, but maybe that's for another post. Needless to say, I am very very tired of moving!
We've been in College Station, Tx for a little over two years and we love it. We bought our first home last June which was a huge step towards saying "we want to stay here for as long as we can." We're both dreamers and always have new ideas of where we are going in life, this tends to change weekly, if not daily. Those who have been in ComGroup with us know what we're talking about and we love you for your patience!
This may be dull but I'm going to keep talking in hopes that telling our story will spur more interesting thoughts. Jeff went back to school this past fall, he never finished which was probably good because he wouldn't have been happy doing what he thought he wanted to do then. He is studying animation - he's so talented, he's going to make movies someday!
I work and have been working full-time for just over two years. It's a new world, this full-time job thing. I liked it better when I had free time during the day, but hey - that's why it's called work. I am an event planner so I do have fun at my job -- quick plug: if you are hosting an event in the area, check us out http://www.royaltypecans.com/.
I'm not sure what I want to do forever though, some of that involves being at home but some working as well. I think I'd love to teach college but don't know when I'll have the opportunity to go back to school. Jeff will hopefully graduate Dec 2012 so until then, work I will!
I'll be honest, it's been tough...
Learning how to fully give yourself to a job 40 hours a week, find time to go to the store, make dinner, pick up the house, shower, etc and still be involved in numerous relationships is tough. I certainly am not a workaholic, I choose home activities over work when I can, but I also have a strong work ethic that leaves me feeling guilty when I don't get everything done that I needed to (maybe that's not work ethic there). I am also a very scheduled person and my current job is very, very spontaneous - so I'm learning to adjust. It's stressful but I think I'm handling it well.
No kids yet, that is probably a good topic for another post as well. We've tried unsuccessfully for a while now and though we are very open to adoption, have a lot of questions about it before we head down that road. More than anything, we just want God to place a baby in our lap - I know that doesn't happen very often so it may be wishful thinking but I also know it does happen, I've heard numerous stories of couple's getting a call that there is a baby waiting for them. Maybe that's not a good way to think though, maybe we need to put more effort into it. It's such a HUGE thing so we don't want to take it lightly.
Luckily we've been blessed with an amazing community full of adoption minded people who are always willing to give us advice. We look forward to more converstations there.
Our church is awesome, Community Church truly lives up to it's name. We never knew what community meant and how to actually live it. This group knows how to love each other, challenge each other, encourage each other, and take care of each other like I have never seen. We're not perfect, no one is. But we love everyone there and know they love us, that is unusual to find and we feel incredibly blessed that God has allowed us to be a part of it.
I don't know how blog etiquette goes regarding length of a post but I'd rather cut it short than ramble on for too long. I hope this is not the last post from me - I hate to say that but I fully expect that I will not make time to sit down and type very often. Maybe that would be a good challenge for me, I guess we'll have to see...
I used to journal a lot, daily, sometimes multiple entries a day. I haven't done that as much lately - when I say lately, I mean the past two years. It may be because I don't have as much time any more, but I see mothers of five children blogging/journaling - time shouldn't be an issue. Maybe I've just gotten bored with my thoughts. I certainly have thoughts, I talk to myself all day long, maybe it's just boring to write them down because they're typically the same thoughts I had last week. Wow! That makes my life sound awful - life really isn't boring, it's great, just with boring thoughts.
Another reason I realized it may be a good idea to blog is, well for one I like typing more than handwriting (isn't that sad, what a technical world we live in?), but also because more and more lately I am not sure of what to say to people that ask "how are the Hankins doing?" My response is always "good," because we are good, life is good. But I feel I owe the people in my life more of an explanation than "good." I just can't ever think of what to say in the moment, we work, we play, we hang out with people, we eat and sleep, then do it all over. Once again - life is not boring, just repetitive!
Maybe I'll start by sharing our story so people can know a bit more about where we are coming from. My husband Jeff and I have been married for 4.5 years. We're still in a place where we have to include the .5 in our years so we feel more experienced! But really, we're still newlyweds - we've learned a lot but have so much more to learn. He grew up in Texas, outside of Houston, I grew up in Nebraska, we met and married in Michigan, and have since lived in Kansas, Ohio, and now Texas. The story is longer, but maybe that's for another post. Needless to say, I am very very tired of moving!
We've been in College Station, Tx for a little over two years and we love it. We bought our first home last June which was a huge step towards saying "we want to stay here for as long as we can." We're both dreamers and always have new ideas of where we are going in life, this tends to change weekly, if not daily. Those who have been in ComGroup with us know what we're talking about and we love you for your patience!
This may be dull but I'm going to keep talking in hopes that telling our story will spur more interesting thoughts. Jeff went back to school this past fall, he never finished which was probably good because he wouldn't have been happy doing what he thought he wanted to do then. He is studying animation - he's so talented, he's going to make movies someday!
I work and have been working full-time for just over two years. It's a new world, this full-time job thing. I liked it better when I had free time during the day, but hey - that's why it's called work. I am an event planner so I do have fun at my job -- quick plug: if you are hosting an event in the area, check us out http://www.royaltypecans.com/.
I'm not sure what I want to do forever though, some of that involves being at home but some working as well. I think I'd love to teach college but don't know when I'll have the opportunity to go back to school. Jeff will hopefully graduate Dec 2012 so until then, work I will!
I'll be honest, it's been tough...
Learning how to fully give yourself to a job 40 hours a week, find time to go to the store, make dinner, pick up the house, shower, etc and still be involved in numerous relationships is tough. I certainly am not a workaholic, I choose home activities over work when I can, but I also have a strong work ethic that leaves me feeling guilty when I don't get everything done that I needed to (maybe that's not work ethic there). I am also a very scheduled person and my current job is very, very spontaneous - so I'm learning to adjust. It's stressful but I think I'm handling it well.
No kids yet, that is probably a good topic for another post as well. We've tried unsuccessfully for a while now and though we are very open to adoption, have a lot of questions about it before we head down that road. More than anything, we just want God to place a baby in our lap - I know that doesn't happen very often so it may be wishful thinking but I also know it does happen, I've heard numerous stories of couple's getting a call that there is a baby waiting for them. Maybe that's not a good way to think though, maybe we need to put more effort into it. It's such a HUGE thing so we don't want to take it lightly.
Luckily we've been blessed with an amazing community full of adoption minded people who are always willing to give us advice. We look forward to more converstations there.
Our church is awesome, Community Church truly lives up to it's name. We never knew what community meant and how to actually live it. This group knows how to love each other, challenge each other, encourage each other, and take care of each other like I have never seen. We're not perfect, no one is. But we love everyone there and know they love us, that is unusual to find and we feel incredibly blessed that God has allowed us to be a part of it.
I don't know how blog etiquette goes regarding length of a post but I'd rather cut it short than ramble on for too long. I hope this is not the last post from me - I hate to say that but I fully expect that I will not make time to sit down and type very often. Maybe that would be a good challenge for me, I guess we'll have to see...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)